mixed feelings...

once again, the examination results for last june were out.. it was released at about 12pm, precisely yesterday since it's past midnight now..i only came online 12 hours after it was released (cause i didn't wanna spoil my day, incase it does) to check my results.. as i opened my email, i scrolled through the junks - notifications from facebook and friendster.. i don't see any of my results email and i'm surprised.. so i logged in to my account on the official website, unsure of my password but eventually it logged in..

the moment the page loaded, my heart "jumped" out.. the indescribable feeling.. like goose bumps but it's not.. and indeed, i passed all the papers and i'm amazed by the results i got.. i know i'm not smart.. i wasn't so hardworking either.. one of the 4 papers, i did really badly..it's really shocking.. i don't deserve such marks and i know it is by God's grace that i passed.. not just pass but passed with flying colours..that was the toughest semester i went through so far (more to come) and God truly brought me through despite how often i've failed him.. how often i didn't put my trust in Him and worry.. again, i've gotta have more faith in Him..

it's really a huge relief, now that i can officially set both feet on where i am now.. no worries about deferring classes.. yet, the feelings after i knew my results were indescribable either.. there were mixed feelings.. i don't know.. but i'm happy..all glory to God and not me..

LAN subject's commencing tomorrow.. oh gosh, i'm gonna meet my "worst enemy" again.. i've not touched history in ages and i dread to meet history again.. i thought i bid farewell with history in form 5.. it's called pengajian malaysia by the way..what a waste of time.. i should have got it done earlier but the timetables were clashing.. i don't even know who's taking it with me cause all my friends have already taken it..

guess that's all for now.. i'm late for bedtime, again.. till then !!

p/s. congrats to all who passed even if you didn't pass certain papers..celebrate the papers you've passed.. and i read this somewhere : don't get disappointed when God doesn't give you what you want..for He knows the best time for you to have it..